THE BROOM - MIRROR STORY RETOLD by Vinay Trilokekar

MIRROR STORY RETOLD by Vinay Trilokekar

Scene I

Once upon a time, there lived, a lovely little princess named Snow White. (You all know about her, no doubt.) Her vain and wicked stepmother, the Queen, feared that someday Snow White's beauty would surpass her own. So she dressed the little princess in rags and forced her to work as a scullery maid. Each day, as you know, the vain queen consulted her magic mirror, "Magic Mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?"... and as long as the mirror answered, "You are the fairest of them all," Snow White was safe from the Queen's cruel jealousy.

In this manner, each day, the wicked queen consulted the magic mirror and she was happy to hear each time ---- “You’re the fairest of them all, my Queen!”

She tried her best even to get rid of her. She made several such attempts. She believed that she was finally successful in getting rid of her, until this happened.  

 

Queen: Slave in the magic mirror, come from the farthest space, through wind and darkness I summon thee. Speak! Let me see thy face.

Magic Mirror: What wouldst thou know, my Queen?

Queen: Magic mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?

Magic Mirror: Famed is thy beauty, Majesty. Behold, a lovely maid I see. Rags cannot hide her gentle grace. Alas, she is more fair (fairer) than thee.

Queen: Alas for her! Reveal her name.

Magic Mirror: Lips red as the rose. Hair black as ebony. Skin white as snow.

Queen: Snow White!

Being informed for the first time thus that Snow White is still alive and the most fair, the Evil Queen is consumed with rage and hurls an object at the mirror, causing it to crack. As she travels to the wedding, the Evil Queen begins to age rapidly as the mirror continues to crack. By the time she reaches the wedding and bursts in, she is an old hag and is humiliated by the crowd. She leaves and, simultaneously with the mirror in her castle, disintegrates into a pile of dust while Snow White and the Prince are married. But did the Evil Queen really disintegrate?

Scene II

But what you perhaps, don’t know that there is the twist in the story.  Snow White and Prince Charming did live happily ever after. However, that was not the end for our wicked Queen. The mirror did disintegrate into a pile of dust, but not before cursing our Queen.

 

Queen: Slave in the magic mirror, come from the farthest space, through wind and darkness I summon thee for this last time before you turn into a pile of dust. Speak! Let me see thy face for this last time.

Magic Mirror: What wouldst thou know, you wicked Queen?

Queen: Magic mirror on the wall, am I the ugliest one of all?

Magic Mirror: Stop! You will turn into a witch and live forever with this ugly face and your wicked ways! From now on, you will not have anything to do with beauty. You will live in filth and dirt.

So our Queen turned into a wicked ugly witch.  So she went from place to place, casting her wicked spells. She poisoned the young minds, compelling them to engage themselves in terrorism, subversive and anti-social activities.  There were floods and famines and there were earthquakes too. But she wanted to do more harm with her evil spells.

And the wicked witch went flying on her thick broom in search of the dirtiest place in the world, where she could settle down and go about her wicked ways. She had covered the whole globe without coming across such a place where she could cast her wicked spells and complete her wicked missions.  Then she found the place. She decided to settle here. The place , she was informed, was famous (notorious) for the open sewers, being cluttered  with refuse and human waste and the whole place was unbearable  sight and had  disgusting  stench.  This sounded very interesting to her. “This is the place for me,” thought our wicked and cruel witch, “Open gutters, unbearable sight and disgusting stench- why! What else do I want?
Let me have a look,” so saying she flew in on her thick long broom, calling out to her friends, bats and owls.

“Look down below,” shout her friends, the bats and the owls.

                              

                         

       “Yeah, what’s more do we want? Mess  of  giant poop  every step  we take. We’ll step on a gooey   Wow, what an interesting  place! Come on my black  UGLOES  (like beauties) , Come  on let’s  join them .   Let’s  uglify  it more!!! Yeah! That’s the place, meant for us! Let’s fly in!!!

And in they came, flying past the heavy morning smog, enjoying that sooty black smoke, the owls and the bats flashing their dirty black wings  and wicked witch flashing her dirty yellow and crooked  teeth.

Scene III

But then the things were now changing. However, now the 'स्वच्छ भारत अभियान’ was coming in her way.  Yes, things were beginning to look different now with………

THE PRIME MINISTER PROCLAIMS:

''हम सब महात्मा गांधी के स्वच्छ भारत के सपने को पूरा करें -  Let us fulfil Mahatma Gandhi`s vision of Clean India – Swachh Bharat,“प्रधानमंत्री ने कहा (said our Prime Minister), ''स्वच्छ भारत अभियान को देशभक्ति की भावना से जोड़कर देखा जाना चाहिए – Swachh Bharat Abhiyaan should be approached with a bipartisan spirit of patriotism"

He recalled how the nation`s farmers had responded to Shri Shastri`s call of “Jai Jawan, Jai Kisan,” and made India self-sufficient in food security. He said that out of Gandhiji`s two dreams – Quit India, and Clean India, the people had helped to ensure that the first became a reality. However, the second dream – Clean India – still remained unfulfilled.

 

The idea was slowly but surely catching up. Everyone was now jumping on the band wagon.

 

Many accepted the challenge and participated enthusiastically in the campaign. Some even registered their name, pledging of dedicating their time for the Mission. Some even showcased their cleaning activities. The office goers, from high ranking officials, clerks to peons took brooms in hand and so did the teachers and students.  May be all these are staged managed, at least some people think so. It is certainly sad but not shocking. So are some of them, political leaders, dignitaries and other individuals really fussing about with brooms for a photo op projecting themselves as concerned citizens ‘cleaning’ our great Bharat.   Antara Dev Sen, the editor of “The Little Magazine’, says she reminded of a joke she had heard in her childhood. A Fuller Brush salesman is trying to sell a new vacuum cleaner. As soon as the lady of the house opens the door, the salesman rushes into the living room and swiftly empties a bag of rubbish onto her carpet. He then flashes a smug smile at the horrified lady. “Don’t worry, Madam,” he declares grandly. “If my new vacuum cleaner doesn’t clean all this and leave your carpet spotless in the next three minutes, I will eat this rubbish!” The lady brings him a spoon. “Go ahead,” she says, “We have no electricity.” She says that the charade of ‘Swachh Bharat’ reminded her of this story. According to her, many a times a clean road is often selected for these photo ops shows, then ‘dirtied’ by carefully laying out dry leaves, paper bits, etc. carted from elsewhere. It is all about ‘symbolism’.

These ‘Symbolic’ pictures or the genuine ones, showed that the streets of Mumbai were indeed getting cleaned. 

 The Netas took long brooms in their hands. Likewise the office people could not be left behind. And the teachers and their wards too joined in.

But as saying in Gujarati goes ‘જેનું કામ તેનું થાઈ બીજો કરે તો ગોટો ખાઈ’, which roughly translates as ‘One always struggles when one does someone else’s work’. And that someone else enjoys at your cost, like our Atmaram, the sweeper. 

The spirit of Swachh Bharat reverberated through the cities of India. It was spreading like wild fire. There was Mass Movement. This angered our witch very much. She felt that her very existence was being threatened. Then she saw this guy with the broom. He was about to start sweeping. So she decided to cast her spell on the broom itself.

“Why this certainly is the most likable place I‘ve come across!   --------But what’s this? Who the hell he? Atmaram? IDIOT!  What’s he up to?   SWEEPING! Oh no! In this manner he‘ll UNDIRTIFY  the whole  place!.\

“So here I go again--- @# $ *@#$ ---TROUBLE, DOUBLE TROUBLE I CAST ON YOU , YOU SILLY BROOM. YOU’LL BECOME WEAK AND FEEBLE”

Then waana rock & roll  day & nite 

Moon will fade at nite

And Sun too will go out of sight

And with mosquitoes I will dance all nite!!!

"Doesn’t it go like this---It’s like this ‘my fair lady’:

 I could have danced all night----Any way, let’s not be upside down.

 But let’s rock & roll in this Dirty - Filthy Town! ”

 

Yeah, let’s rock & roll in this Filthy Big Town!!!

While all this is going on, 'स्वच्छ भारत अभियान’ and our wicked witch’s snooping in,  poor sweeper, Atmaram, is struggling to his routine daily work.  No help is coming to him from  any quarters, when in other wards, he hears from his peers, there are school and college students, people from NGO , MEDIA, POLITICIANS, FILM STARS , in fact , people from all walks of life  – EVERYBODY IS CLEANING  AND SWEEPING ENMASS and thus lessening the burden of his colleagues  from other wards. This 'स्वच्छ भारत अभियान’ has been carried everywhere but this god dam place.  They have covered  DADAR, BANDRA , COLABA and even DISTANT SUBAURBS,  leaving this place for him to toil.  And this broom -----

Poor fellow is unaware that with flick of her magic wand our cruel little  witch has cast her wicked spell on Atmaram and his working tool--- 

Scene IV

(Is it his broom that isn’t working or he wants sit idle till his ‘MUKADAM’  comes? Lets wait and watch.)

After a long discussion. After a long deliberation. Mukadam, and the other of his colleagues ultimately decide that the broom needs repairing. But they do not know that the broom is under dark spell of our wicked witch. Every morning, around 8 a.m., it’s always Raghunath’s job to dismantle  Atmaram’s broom, untying all those broom sticks, arrange them properly once again and fix them. The whole job takes two hours or may be more. But by the time it is ready and Atmaram can take over, there is hardly any time left to do a good job of cleaning. But of course it can certainly wait for the morrow, can’t it?

 HER SPELL IS REALLY WORKING!!!! Hi,haa, haa!!

RAGHUNATH is an expert. Every day, the Mukadam brings to him loads of brooms for repairs. While he is at his work, the Mukadam and the other sweepers gather around him and watch him doing his ‘rocket –science’ like expedition of dismantling and then meticulously reassembling the broom, taking about an hour for each broom. 

 The next day the story is repeated. Atmaram's broom simply refuses to work. The next, and and the next --- and months roll by.

“Broom bhai, why her magic works ceaselessly on you! ”

 “ I know my brother, Bat. ये आत्माराम भाई समझता नाही- वह चूडेलने कुछ चक्कर जो चलाया है- And he blames me, his loyal broom for his trouble! ”

“It’s past seven months now. Why the place is getting ready for me Fi, Fai, Fo, Hi, Ha, Haa”  

 

“It’s more than seven months now and yet they don’t realise  that it’s her spell! HI, HA ,HA,FI ,FAI, FO, FO !!! Come on! Let’s have some more fun! Yeah MORE FUN- fat ,fat , batily fata fat!!!”

 

“It’s more than seven months now!

Inspector, Inspector of the ward, I’m sure it’s the dirtiest place now!

Oh, inspector, inspector of the ward - Do tell me it’s the dirtiest place on your report card?”

“No, not yet - Getting dirtier and dirtier by the day!

Do not fret. It’s getting dirtier by the day!

It’s all set- It’ll become the dirtiest place some day!”

Scene V

As the days and months roll by, Atma’s broom refuse to work despite Raghu’s efforts and Mukadam’s supervisory skills and garbage goes on piling.  

At them, People do Stop And Stare

Sitting in front of piles of Garbage there!

But They Don’t Care!

For  it is only on the street here

They can sit and dare!

It’s only on the street I live!

(The plagiarist in me again, lifted it straight from Freddy’s mouth while he was singing ‘It’s on the street where you live’ for Eliza Doolittle. Again from My Fair Lady) 

 

 कुणाच्या खांद्यावर कुणाचे ओझे असेंच काहीसे असावे . असो!

“We are almost there!!!! ! Inspector, Inspector of the ward, aren’t we there?

Inspector, Inspector of the ward, be fair - And tell us we are there!”

 

“No, you aren’t there!! Upon my honour, I swear!

I’ve always been fair!!!Therefore I say and swear - You simply aren’t there!!!!”

Scene VI

Is this the dirtiest place on your card? Be fair, it’s almost 9 months on our card

So if you care, tell what it’s says on your Report Card.”

“As the Inspector of this ward, I say ‘You’re almost there’ So says my report card.”

Scene VII

The first thing I did, on this day, was to put up this SIGN BOARD on  my window – sill.  This BIG HOARDING -   DIRTY BLACK WITCH IS PROHIBITED.

And another one on the no ' No Parking' board, where Atmaram watches Raghunath mendind brooms.

  So the witch can’t perform her wicked deeds and cast her cruel spells any longer. So ATMARAM and  broom start working and RAGHUNATH doesn’t have to repair brooms for others. So both of them can carry on with their own work and so does their MUKADAM.  AND SWACHH BHARAT ABHIYAAN will now be taken forward!!!

And finally the feeling of futility began to creep in her mind. 

 “””’My wand, it seems, has lost its charm

Now, I know,

It causes no harm

So let’s go

Where I can keep my calm!

And off she went! Could this be THE END?

And all the while you believed that it the Wicked Queen. You thought that it

was she, who had turned into the Wicked Witch. Is the Wicked Witch for real? No, certainly not! The Wicked Witch recides in the mind of people like our Atmaram, who are shirkers, dodgers, idlers, (there could be many adjectives to describe such people) कामचोर (in Marathi), નકામું or આળસુ ( in Gujarati) आलसी (in Hindi). 

It is not only,as the old saying in Gujarati goes ‘જેનું કામ તેનું થાઈ બીજો કરે તો ગોટો ખાઈ’, 'One always struggles when one does someone else’s work’, but one creats people like our Atmaram,who enjoy at your cost, when you do their work. 

It reminds of the famous song written by Lerner, Alan Jay/ loewe, Frederick for ‘My Fair Lady’. It is sung by Eliza’s father, Alfred P. Doolittle (the character played in the movie by Stanley Holloway), the dustman, and others in the chorus. Here it is in verbatim:    

(Eliza's father):
The Lord above gave man an arm of iron
So he could do his job and never shirk.

The Lord above gave man an arm of iron-but
With a little bit of luck, With a little bit of luck,
 

Someone else'll do the blinkin' work!
With a little bit...with a little bit...
With a little bit of luck you'll never work!

They're always throwing goodness at you;
But with my little bit of luck A man can duck!
The Lord above made man to help is neighbor,
No matter where, on land, or sea, or foam.
The Lord above made man to help his neighbor-but
With a little bit of luck, With a little bit of luck,
When he comes around you won't be home!

With a little bit...with a little bit...
With a little bit of luck, You won't be home.
With a little bit, with a little bit
With a little bit of bloomin' luck!

A man was made to help support his children
Which is the right and proper thing to do
A man was made to hep support his children-but
With a little bit of luck, With a little bit of luck
They'll go out and start supporting you!

With a little bit, with a little bit
With a little bit of luck
They'll work for you!
With a little bit, with a little bit
With a little bit of bloomin' luck!

 Now, imagine our sweeper, Atmaram in the place of Eliza's father. 

With a little bit... with a little bit ..

'With a little bit'; what 'little bit of luck' 

He has 'All the blessed luck'! 

So let each one do his own work and don't let anyone do someone else's work as the Gujarati saying goes ' જાણું કામ તેનુ થાઈ ......' otherwise more such Atmaram will be born. 

 

Vinay Trilokekar