Our Mother and गावाची अलक मावशी !
One doesn’t need a special day to remember one’s mother. Nevertheless,
if I don’t say anything about my mother on this internationally declared ‘Mother’s
Day’ …..
My mother, oops our mother (I want to share my feelings with my sisters as well) was great. Ah, that’s what every child feels about
his mother, you’d say. Every mother takes care of her children, you’d say, and may be
rightly so. But my mother was different and special, not just to us, my four sisters
and me. I remember once late Mr. Pramod Navalkar, who was Maharashtra’s Cultural Minister then, had written in our
community magazine 'प्रभू प्रभात (Prabhu Prabhat) as well as in one of दिवाळी अंक (Diwali issue) of ‘ भटक्यांची भ्रमंती ' (Bhatkyachi Bhramanti) about
her. He had called गावाची अलक मावशी (Alak aunty of the neighbourhood) . He had written thus (may be not in verbatim, but just the gist of it) : 'आमच्या अलक मावशी गावाच्याच आहेत. (She was alive then). आपल्या पांच लेकरांसोबत चाळीतील सर्व मुलांमुलींना घेऊन दिवाळीत मौज मजा करण्यास घेऊन जात असत. एवढेच नाहीतर आपल्या लहानश्या घरात मुलींच्या मैत्रिणींचे मंगळागौर सारखे कार्यक्रम देखील साजरे करून मुलींना महेरपण दिले. ... अलक मावशी वाघीण आहेत. त्यांचा चाळीत मोठा दरारा. त्यामुळे त्यांच्या मुलीची चेष्टा सोडा वाईट नजरेने बघण्याचे कोणही घडास करीत नव्हते. ...'
Yes, she played
that role of aunty to the others as well as being our mother perfectly while she raised us. She had full faith in God and her doctors. She believed
that our deity, Vrajreshwari had the power to solve any problem. 'Your
son is not getting admission in school', 'you are finding it difficult to
get a suitable match for your daughter', or any other problem and she had ready made solutions to all of them. " Come with me to Vrajreshwari , देवीला साकडं घाल की काम झाल्यावर मी परत येईन, and your desires will be fulfilled."
Once Dr. Chaukar (a gold medallist, top ranker and a friend of my cousin) wanted to be be assistant to Dr. Ernest Borges Dr. Borges had rejected him. My cousin told him Alak maushi would do his work and she did manage to do his work after he promised that he would come with her to Vrajreshwari temple. One fine morning he did come to our place and took her to the temple. Such was her faith!
Once one of my
acquaintances, Dr. Anita, called me to tell me that how she was surprised when
Dr. Prafulla B. Desai (a Padma Bhushan recipient and her dad’s student)
remembered my mother. I told her that my mom was the first cancer patient that
he operated upon and I went on to tell how her dad, Dr. Ernest Borges,
considered my mom as his sister and hence declined to operate on her then and
asked his student, Dr.P.B.Desai to perform the surgery instead. All went well
for my mother. She was indebted to both of them and of course to the Almighty.
She would quite often express these feelings of her having full faith in both
of them and she was so very grateful to them for enabling her to lead and live
normal life. Incidentally, prior to my mother’s death, Tata Memorial Hospital
records showed my mother as ‘the longest surviving cancer patient’ with her
photograph below it and which would often be circulated among the resident
cancer patients as a morale booster. In fact, Dr. Borges would tell me, “This
lady deserves A Nobel, if there was one for fighting so bravely against such a
dreadful disease. I admire her will power and desire to live.” Incidentally,
Dr. Borges passed away much before my mother did.
Dr. Ernest Borges, considered my mom as his sister and hence
declined to operate on her then telling her ‘she being his sister he couldn’t
put a knife on her’ and his student, Dr.Praful B.Desai would perform the
surgery instead’. May be it was his way of introducing his student to his first
surgery at the same time putting the patient’s mind at rest. All went well for
my mother. She was indebted to both of them and of course to the Almighty. She
would quite often express these feelings of her having full faith in both of
them and she was so very grateful to them for enabling her to lead and live
normal life. Incidentally, prior to my mother’s death, Tata Memorial Hospital
records showed my mother as ‘the longest surviving cancer patient’ with her
photograph below it and which would often be circulated among the resident
cancer patients as a morale booster. In fact, Dr. Borges would tell me, “This
lady deserves ‘A Nobel’, if there was one for fighting so bravely against such
a dreadful disease. I admire her will power and desire to live.” Incidentally,
Dr. Borges passed away in 1969, much before my mother did. Even after the
surgery she religiously followed her doctors' advice and underwent radiations
and chemotherapy regularly.
Yes, she had this desire and own reasons to survive, first
it was for her son (that’s me),who was schooling then - She would say, "
Doctor, I always tell my God, my son is young, let him ---then He can take
me." The list was long and kept changing - wanted him to
complete his graduation, then getting employed, then wait for his marriage and
those of her daughters and then to see her grand children and got the bonus of
seeing her great- grand - child as well. Now she had fulfilled her desires. Now
she no longer any reasons to live and she had nothing to look forward to.
Everyone was doing reasonably well in life. It was her moment of contentment.
She no longer had any more of that desire to live. She simply passed away on 30th
August, 1988 many years after her doctor – Dr. Ernest Borges, the eminent
oncologist, had passed away. We all are indebted to the entire BORGES FAMILY
and Dr. Prafulla B, Deasi, who is today a top consulting cancer surgeon and
recipient of Padma Bhushan.
Had I been a good writer, I could write volumes on her. Had I been Maxim Gorky, I could write a novel on her. But here it is just small piece as a tribute to this great lady.
Vinay Trilokekar
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